Fear

Forget everything and run or face everything and rise. Two meanings, the choice is yours.

Fear. What does you consider fearful? What is that one thought which triggers your fight or flight hormones? Clearly, this requires closer analysis.

Fear of separation? Seclusion? Everyone has varied answers, but the sensation is identical in all cases. As Google defines it, fear is an unpleasant feeling triggered by the perception of danger, real or imagined.

What is danger? A threatening situation, perhaps. What kind of threats, though? Here also, as we are manipulating psychological variables, the answers will be subjective.

Take, for example, a toddler. He must be enduring a lot of threats. After all, he's new to this world and every second object would land up in the ambit of threat to security: thus causing fear. Instances like an unexpected encounter with a fearful animal, exposure to loud noises or even momentary separation from parents can all be considered as a source of fear for the child. In retaliation, the child might throw tantrums, or cry all day long, much to the discomfort of his/her parents and family.

Now consider an adolescent. Teenage years, racy years. Years one spends with friends; or bonds more firmly with family. Rosy as this time might sound, it would not be cogent to say that this period is without any challenges, insecurities or fearful situations of its own. Basing further arguments on Erikson's theories emphasising on a search for identity, one thing is clear - an adolescent is in the pursuit of acceptance. Acceptance from a peer group; seclusion and rejection from which would cause fear in the mind of the individual. What group next? Which group will accept me now? And a few such self-depreciating thoughts later, the adolescent is addicted to delinquency. That's a consequence of futile fears.

Adulthood brings forth the fear of commitments and duties. How well we stand our ground in terms of family, business, relationships can sometimes transform from a moral issue to a question of our ethos. Such dizzying questions stress out the adult mind and it fears the day he wouldn't be able to maintain his principles. Treading on to a righteous path, one expects a genial old age. But when has life been a bed of roses, ever?

Old age brings the fear of death. The mere anticipation of bodily mortification so petrifies the elderly, they begin stewing mindless prophecies and cock and bull stories about life and philosophy in their minds. Feeling every perception in their body, except a thirst for life. Fear. Drives many to live and on the other side, frightens many to death. As Shakespeare calls old-age, second childishness, one can sense the fear of losing one's near and dear ones yet again on the foreheads of the once jovial beings.

What this post says shouldn't be taken on face value. Generalisation is the crime of this century and one must fear it's consequences.

Getting back to some enclosing points.

Often we are aware of things to be afraid of. We know not what things are secure. But then as Plato rightly put it, "Courage is knowing what not to fear."

Confessions of a (Forced) Tea-totaller

The morning birds are in rhapsody, the marble floor reciprocates the sheen of the mighty Sun beckoning the new day. And through the open window, the air wafts sounds of children on their promenade to the bus stop, walking albeit briskly. All pawns in place for a perfect morning. And as I glance through the pantry, I chance upon a sealed package of masala chai, on the cusp of being devoured by my caffeine devoid self. Ceremoniously I begin to uncover it, inch by inch, looking lustfully at it. No cover-ups now!

The mere aroma of it makes my senses twitch. For indulgences are enjoyed best when prohibited.

This is my confession, the confession of a (forced) te(a)totaller. I've been three weeks clean...(sigh)

It all started one regular day. Some friends and I went to a fancy tea outlet. This swanky place had all sorts of teas; you name it, they had it. As for me, all human sanity was lost. Guided by my instincts, I fired away my order - Masala Chai! The piping hot tea resembled my fiery desire to have just one cup of tea. But who can question or reason addictions. Every swig of the tea made me want to gulp down gallons and gallons of it. Due to economic constraints, I had no more than 5 cups of tea. While in dreamland, I never worry for the bill - but my friends sure did. Silently, the host paid the price of bringing me along. No conversation took place on the way back.

Returning home, longing for that caffeine high, I chose the choicest of teas I had kept for special occasions.

I was relishing the tea when suddenly the rusk (can't explain, it's like a long biscuit you have with tea here in India) disappeared in the cup. With frustration, I struggled to find the soggy semi-solid out of the cup. And then I made a wrong decision. A very wrong one. I pledged to never ever have tea again!
Foolish decision, I know but now I can't break it, as people of my clan are known for their commitment. So, folks I have little choice.

Dingding! Somebody is at the door, oh wait! It's Sunita from the ground floor. Well, looks like I can have a glass or two of iced tea with her;)

Flight to the American Dream...3 Years Back

America, the superpower, the land of cartoons and superheroes, the land of Hollywood, the land of opportunities, the land where I was about to set foot on. I couldn't contain my excitement, courtesy the adrenaline rush which grappled my body at just a glance at the itenary. The buck did not stop at Uncle Sam; our schedule had some weeks reserved for paying a visit to Her Majesty's majestic city, London!

It hadn't even been ten days into June and I was sitting in a giant British Airways aircraft. The journey to the airport was exciting, yes, but the nightmares my juvenile mind conceived whilst in the plane egged me to find the nearest exit and rush back home. Alas, gambling momentary emotions with a humongous sum of three lakhs would be a terrible bargain. I remained fixated to that itchy, uncomfortable seat, fearing the worst as projected by Air Crash Investigation episodes which I had watched with bittersweet curiosity in the past few years. The only respite to my fears was the window, through which I could see the world beyond, peaceful, drowsed in sweet midnight sleep. I reported my worries to my sister and unknowingly transmitted the same anxiety to her. Being the good person she is, she didn't let me know that and constantly urged me to consciously weigh the frugality of my intrusive thoughts. No sooner had I alleviated my fears than the plane shot past the runway and took off skywards. I dozed off after half an hour or so.

Bollywood Classroom

Phalke Academy is one of the most reputed schools in India. Established in Mumbai in 1913, its benches have seen pretty faces, gossip mongers, legends, macho men, comedians; all under one roof. As of today, the academy submits the highest number of papers yearly, beating the prestigious Premier School of Los Angeles - its fitting competitor. Over the years, the Phalke Academy has been in a turbulent relationship with its neighbours down south, who allege the academy of blatant plagiarism.

Infrastructure-wise, the school is top-notch with the state of the art technology used in all classrooms. Currently, we have Mr. Bachchan, the Dean of the college taking the attendance of the classroom with a Dolby Atmos outputting microphone. All present, all right. Let’s get all the students introduced to you:-

Alia Bhatt: Started off with the Farida Jalal Motherly Playschool in 1998. Started off schooling here in 2012. A great student but a little poor in GK (she’s improving). She is a staff child. Being among the toppers of the class, she plans to go to the UK for higher studies, education would be cheaper for her there. If the students are right, then something’s surely brewing between her and another staff-child (five years senior to her). The academy hasn’t released an official statement as yet.

Vicky Kaushal: He is a the heartthrob of girls, and an idol for boys. His skills are getting better by the day. He’s among the toppers of the class and his father is an excellent athlete along with Mr. Shetty, Starting off in 2015, Kaushal won an award for submitting an outstanding paper on friendship and loyalty last year at the Annual Function.

Ayushmann Khurrana: Shifted schools in 2012. From the Vaicom Academy. Chooses to write unconventional papers along with an unconventional faculty. He also won an award last year for his excellent paper on a piano player. He is also sings really well and writes lyrics with his buddy Rochak Kohli. Despite his bench partner’s illness, he is carrying on a new project. We at the Academy are super proud of him.

Vivek Oberoi: Bad Company, that’s what happened to him. He was an excellent student and among the toppers of the class until he got into a relationship with the most beautiful classmate of his and later into a brawl with the school bully. He’s trying to mend his ways, start a new chapter and currently he’s done submitting a paper on the Prime Minister of India. The Academy is yet to scrutinise the paper.

Salman Khan: The Academy is too scared to disclose any information as of now. All we know is that he started off in the late 80s and always misses out on winning awards at the Annual function. Oh and he doesn't have a permanentbench partner as yet. His father was the librarian.

Ajay Devgn: His father was also a great athlete who gave him admission in the academy, way back in 1991. We still remember how he entered the school gate on two motorbikes. He sits with a staff-child and has recently published a paper on relationships. The Academy had sent him a notice for eating too much of Paan Masala in the classroom; all we got was the standard two fingered salute of his. Throughout his schooling years, Devgn has proved his mettle, writing papers on split-identity, Bhagat Singh and a most remarkable one on Othello along with Bharadwaj sir (known for teaching Shakespeare plays in his own style).

Eemran Hashmi: People think girls feel uncomfortable near him but we at Phalke, say that he is one of the most gentlemanly students here. Also he has a great ear for music which complements his papers.

Aamir Khan: He was addicted to topping the class, but then after his latest paper, our perceptions have changed. A better paper was expected out of him. Actually he has a tendency to submit his papers only once a year. The International Committee also recognized his paper and his work was nominated for the Golden International Certification. For 31 years, he's been in the Academy, winning hearts but lesser awards. He doesn't wish to come to the school Annual Function and is made fun of over there. Occasionally he also finances his projects.

Saif Ali Khan: He joined the Academy in 1993. His first bench partner had joined earlier in the 80s along with a staff child. He was a shy guy at first, not noticeable till 2001 when he submitted an excellent paper with Aamir. Till then his performance has been dangling but he keeps on experimenting. He had a disagreement with his former bench partner and settled down with a junior staff child. Talks of his relatives never seem to exhaust, now that Sara has joined our Academy and Taimur is a budding aspirant for the Farida Jalal Motherly Playschool. His father was a great cricketer and his mother is a part of the senior jury here.

Akshay Kumar: The ace athlete of the class. Can be found jogging at the school premises at 4 in the morning. Patriotism oozes out of his papers. Questions were raised when, during the Independence Day celebrations, Akshay signed his name as Rajiv and accidently unfurled the maple leaf instead of the tricolour. Poor Akshay couldn't sleep that night and is now trying to prove that he's all for India. He recently interviewed the Prime Minister. Some fun facts: His former friend's face resembles that of his present bench partner. He calls his bench partner Funnybones.

Farhan Akhtar: The rockstar of the class - though when he sings, some students offer hkm Honitus to clear his throat, Farhan feels sad about that. Staff child. His father used to work with Salman's father at the library and now helps him complete his papers. He shares a cordial relation with all students.

Shahrukh Khan: Known by many names like Baadshah, Deewana, Baazigar, Dilwala, etc - united by SRK. The academy recalls how this fellow came to the Academy from the Delhi branch. His resemblance with the Rev. Dilip Kumar was a catalyst of buzz in the Academy. In a matter of few papers he became a favourite of the class. His recent papers though, have not received favourable reviews. He still gets nominated in the Annual Function ceremonies. The Academy shall promote him to senior faculty in a decade or so.

Uh-oh! Next lecture about to start. Will introduce you to many more students later.
Bye!

Autobiography of a Computer

Welcome, how may I help you? Tell me, or rather command me and once commanded, I can store up gazillions of words and characters in my memory. Such teeny meany bits won’t acquire much gigs of my space. But now, I am going to analyze my memory, through the stages of my life. So, sit back and enjoy as I unravel my story from Pascal to PowerPoint…

I was born very fat, Charlie (Babbage), my dad (as I called him) was very fond of me and knew every nook and corner of me. A beep and a bop and lo behold, I was at life. They used some very fat tubes to power me, but now I’ve become potable and manageable! Anyways, let

s continue…

Soon I met one of Charlie’s friends, Lady Ada Lovelace, who gave me my first name - Ada. But that’s not my name now, I’ve got plenty of them - Tux, Windows, Lion, Tiger (of course all fine creations of Uncle Steve).

As I grew up, I travelled to various laboratories, one such was Bell Laboratories, where I got another software (I prefer calling it name) - LINUX/UNIX. That was a very lengthy name as I resorted to call myself Tux (after that penguin, of course). Then, I went to IBM and then I met Uncle Steve, who gave me a very delicious name - Apple, but the only conflict between me and him was that he ate some part of it and then brought me genus Panthera, giving me names of pesky, wildcats…

And then, came my best friend, Bill, who started a company called Microsoft. He launched my new name - Windows. Funny name, I thought but then I opened my windows to various parts of the world, connecting people. And who helped me? WWW, one of my most valuable friends.

But slowly and steadily, the youngsters are catching up and I’ve been left behind. I feel very lonely as I’ve got very less masters to serve and my previous masters have resorted to some weird electronic called smartphones! They have got some brains in them.

And then, this war has begun. WWW’s boss, Larry has started/launched some funny guy - Android. But he’s jolly sweet. Kit-Kat, Marshmallow, Lollipop, oh! He’s going to crash me someday.

Even worse is Uncle Steve’s marvel (for you all), iPhone! This ruddy thing also has usurped my throne of supremacy.

“Though the phones are gold studded,

Old is gold,

My concept will soon get outdated and shredded,

ERROR 404”

An Open Letter to Trailer Makers

Dear Trailer Makers,

Do bear in mind that this comes from a movie and television buff that has grown up worshiping your franchise.

Google defines “trailers” as a series of extracts from a film or broadcast, used for advancing publicity.

We all know that the inception of a blockbuster lies in an engrossing trailer. If we glance at trailers from yesteryear films, they gripped us to the end, scratching our brains to crack the enigmatic code the movie withheld. Thanks to advancements in the media, these short extracts can be made more exciting than ever.

The sole purpose of this letter is to highlight the lack of creativity; and predictability that your trailers possess. They don’t give us the much needed adrenaline fillip now. Such is the sorry situation that even an amateur at storytelling can decipher the plot of the movie in seconds. Wit and directorial craft have taken a backseat. Something is wrong, isn’t it?

Another major problem with your trailers is a veritable fiasco of dialogues, which are as cliche and comical as a children’s book. Do try to at least showcase the finesse of the writers.

The audience waits eagerly for a particular movie to hit the theaters. A cinematic treat awaits us at the movies but courtesy of your trailer, YouTube suffices for some.

This is neither a hate-letter nor a bouquet of rage; these are just suggestions to set up a better stage!

With all due respect, kindly preview the trailer before pressing the upload button and see if your piece of art does justice to the movie.

Regards
A movie buff.

Fascinating Fonts...

One aspect in our school life which breaks us or makes us is our handwriting. The very formation of our letters can become a structure of our own personality for the teachers checking our work. Be it a study-whiz or a mediocre student, poor handwriting always proves to be the Achilles’ heel of the student’s shining career ahead. Following are some of the most bizarre handwritings which teachers face while correcting the notebooks of the children.

The Confused One
This is the writing which is the most messed up. Innumerable cuttings, blots of correction ink and dog ears, characterise the child’s notebook. Usually this writing is an amalgamation of confused vocabulary and dangling grammar. The student just can’t make up his/her mind as to what he/she is about to write and so this confusion is created. A major headache for the teacher.

Deceptive Letters
This is extremely common between the cursive writing strata. Although the work is completed in a jiffy, some poor letters are left aloof in their quest of proving themselves. An ‘a’ there can be easily misunderstood as an ‘o’ due to their stark similarity while writing in cursive. This is certainly a mind-boggling challenge for the teachers as they can’t decipher even one word correctly.

BFG’s Quilt
Harking to the folks whose handwritten alphabets are akin to the size of giants. This gigantic mountain of alphabets is too steep for a teacher’s pen to correct. Although the work is all legible and fine, it is the size of the alphabets that can daze the teachers.

The Cryptic Microscopic Writing
Guests should be treated like Gods but who wants to see Tom Thumb’s relatives on a sheet of paper? This writing style is of the students who throttle the nip of the pen and write teeny-meany alphabets which can fail any electronic microscope. This writing has been the arch-rival of school teachers ever since it has stepped on this planet.

Italics Frenzy
After the long piles of straight, erect handwriting, italics can be refreshing, but if the writing is sliding way too much, something is really wrong. Usually the alphabets formed in this kind of handwriting tend to slide on either sides. This is no less than a dazing roller-coaster ride for the teachers.

No matter how bad or good the handwriting of the students may be, there are some incorrigible, unapologetic people who wish to continue their font, justifying it to be unique. Fortunately, there are some good souls who reform and part ways with illegible handwriting to write a better fate for themselves.